The Myth of Indispensability
By Alan Prushan
There’s a myth in the business world that’s become so embedded, so culturally reinforced, it hides in plain sight: the myth of indispensability. The idea that a leader’s highest value is their ability to be essential. To be the hero. To be the one who never leaves the room, never takes a real vacation, never lets go of the wheel.
Here’s the problem. That kind of leadership isn’t as noble as it sounds. At best, it slows everything down. At worst, it breeds codependency, mistrust, cultural, and leadership development stagnation.
I’ve spent four decades inside organizations coaching leaders, building teams, and dismantling command-and-control paradigms. And I’ve seen it again and again: when leaders hoard power, cultures atrophy, leaving no room for new leaders to emerge. When they cling to the hero narrative, their team’s potential shrinks to fit the narrow margins of what the leader allows.
Indispensability Is a Form of Control
When leaders say “I’m the only one who can do this,” they’re not protecting the company. They’re protecting their ego. This kind of thinking gets baked into the culture, reinforced by applause for long hours and firefighting. Behind that performance is a fear of being irrelevant, unseen, and unneeded.
Control feels productive. It looks like commitment, but it’s a performance drug. It creates a short-term high and a long-term dysfunction.
In reality, the highest-functioning teams operate best when the leader steps back, not in. Authority given is trust extended. Trust extended is ownership activated. Ownership activated is where velocity lives.
Performative Leadership Is a Trap
We’ve long confused leadership with charisma. We’ve glamorized over-functioning and called it excellence. We’ve built entire org charts around the insecurity of one person at the top. When you lead performatively, the spotlight follows you. But so does the bottleneck. Decisions stall. Morale dips. Innovation dries up. People learn to wait for permission instead of exercising judgment. The organization orbits around one person’s approval, and everything slows to the speed of ego.
What Happens When Power Is Hoarded
Power hoarded becomes toxic. Not always through overt abuse, but through subtle cues. Micro-decisions that tell people, “I don’t trust you with this.” A meeting where only certain voices are invited to speak. A feedback loop that flows one direction: down.
The fallout shows up fast. You’ll see it in passive compliance. In team members who stop offering ideas. In this way people play small or stay silent. The very people you hired for their creativity and drive begin to vanish in front of you, emotionally, mentally, and energetically. Their presence becomes muted. Their impact is slowly minimized.
Ego being the long shadow that is, most leaders don’t even notice it’s happening. Because the shadow of leadership is quiet. It’s not what you say; it’s how your presence shapes the room before you speak.
Let Go to Lead
Real leadership is not about being irreplaceable. It’s about being catalytic.
It is letting go of the need to be essential and replacing it with the discipline of allowing others to shine as leaders. Your job as a leader is to engage your team to build structures, relationship standards, and leadership habits that allow others to lead, even when you’re not around. Especially when you’re not around.
This is what Reciprocating Authority is all about. It’s not a management trend. It’s a moral reorientation. It’s the belief that authority, when given away wisely, comes back multiplied, in trust, creativity, speed, and in results.
And yes, it requires courage. Giving away power means surrendering control. It means redefining success. It means dismantling your own hero myth.
But what you gain is far more powerful: a team that moves without your push. A culture that tells the truth. A business that thrives in your presence but doesn’t depend on your shadow.
Begin with the Mirror
So where do you start? With the hardest leadership act of all: self-reflection.
Ask yourself:
What am I holding onto that someone else is ready to carry?
Where is my presence limiting my team’s growth?
What part of me still wants to be the hero?
Then ask your team:
Do you feel safe giving me feedback? Why or why not?
What decisions are you waiting for me to make that you could make?
Where do you need more trust from me?
The Aftermath Is the Real Metric
My clients know I measure leadership by what happens after they leave the room. If things get clearer, faster, and more energized, you’re doing it right. If everything freezes or defers to your authority, you’ve built a dependency, not a culture.
Leadership is sacred. Treat it that way. Give power away. Share the light. Step out of the spotlight and watch others shine.
That’s how you make yourself truly indispensable, by no longer needing to be.